He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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