Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Those nachos came to me in a dream
you made out with another girl for some wings
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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