I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
