I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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