I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
