It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
