So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
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At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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