Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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