How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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