I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize