He asked to "fluff my boner.."
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
