New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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