do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
