Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Randomize
