My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Randomize
