i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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