just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
