You made me cry and you don't even care
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I need to calm my uterus...
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