I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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