Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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