chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
