She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
