Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize