if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
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