No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
