He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Randomize
