I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
