They should really pass out barf bags in church
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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