we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
