Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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