Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
