Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
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