Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
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