You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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