It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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