look no pants
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize