Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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