No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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