One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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