This girl is more easily done than said...
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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