I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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