He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
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