Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
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