they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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