I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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