Got a toothbrush?
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Randomize