Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
me + whiskey = a bad person
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
