she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
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Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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