who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
