No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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